Our plan for Christmas Eve was to have the kids open our presents in the morning and then open presents from my parents in the evening after church, we wanted to keep to plan as closely as possible. We were eager to leave the hospital and get home. It was very difficult to leave empty handed. I cried all the way. I even asked the nurse if there were any babies at the hospital that needed a mommy. It was pathetic, but I thought that there could be a scared young girl needing a safe place for her baby. There actually was such a girl there, but she had already chosen adoptive parents.
We arrived home around 11:30 am, just as Andrew started throwing up. Nothing like a sick child to pull you out of your sadness and throw you into your mom role. He didn't feel like opening any presents for a while, but started to feel better about 7:00 and they opened all their gifts as we had planned. It was a fantastic distraction. My parents stayed until around midnight and helped us set up for Santa and clean up the house a bit.
I held together pretty well until I looked at a picture of Lucas on my phone. I talked for a while and began to feel a bit better.
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